“Does she like me?”
You’re not the first person to ask this question. And you certainly won’t be the last. It’s 2020, and you’d think we’d be better at dating and relationships by now.
But some things never change. Some of us are still scared of rejection. And not all of us are confident enough to ask a girl about her feelings outright.
Fortunately for you, there are some signs you can watch out for that may give you a clue. In this article, we’ll talk about 16 signs—all according to science—that tell if she likes you.
Let’s get started.
16 science-backed signs a girl likes you
1. Just ask
Hear me out:
Yes, it’s scary to put yourself in a situation where you might get rejected. But sometimes, facing the firing squad is the best option.
Asking a girl if she likes you may be nervewracking and intimidating. But it saves you a lot of time, effort, and wasted feelings. The sooner you know, the better for you in the long run.
If you ask, either one of two things can happen:
- She’ll say she has feelings for you and you can go from there. You’ll be able to start building intimacy that could progress to a great relationship.
- She says she doesn’t like you and that’s that. It hurts for a bit, and then you’ll move on and hopefully find someone who likes you. You don’t end up spending months pining for someone who just doesn’t feel the same way.
Either way, it works out for the best. If you can, just be honest and learn how to ask for it.
As licensed psychotherapist Barton Goldsmith aptly puts it:
“When you open your mouth, you are also opening your heart, and knowing that someone truly hears what you are feeling and understands you is soothing to your soul.”
Cultivating honesty in your life is the best thing you can do to achieve the love you deserve. It may not work out for you now, but it will pave the way for healthier, more genuine relationships in the future.
If you are still feeling shy about asking her, know that it’s completely okay too. For some of us, it’s just extra hard to be vulnerable. Here are some signs to tell if she likes you or not:
2. She tries to spend as much time with you as she can
When a girl likes you, she’ll make no qualms about spending time with you. She says yes to your date propositions. She may even initiate to hang out with you herself.
That’s because according to science, we are more likely to form emotional bonds with people we regularly spend close contact with. That’s why we end up forming strong relationships in school, work, our communities. The more “exposed” we are to someone, the higher the chance they will like us.
Nothing says “I like you more” than “I want to spend as much time with you as I can.” If she’s voluntarily hanging out with you, that’s because she truly wants to.
3. She loves talking to you
We don’t enjoy talking to every person around us, right? If you notice that she’s eager to talk to you, then it’s a clear sign that she likes you.
Let’s face it: Initial conversations with women can be tough. However, you can turn a potentially awkward moment into a moment of connection simply by finding common ground with them.
I learned this technique from Kate Spring. She’s a best-selling author and is considered to be one of the best dating coaches in the world.
Kate’s created a free online video where she gives you several techniques like this guaranteed to help you better attract women.
Watch the video here. It’s 100% free and there are no strings attached.
4. She mirrors you
It may be easier to lie with our mouths, but body language is almost fool-proof—unless you’re a highly-trained spy. Many experts believe that non-verbal cues make up a big percentage of communication, even more so than verbal cues.
So if you really wanna know how a girl feels about you, simply watch out for her body language.
One particularly telling thing to look out for is something called “mirroring.”
Mirroring is the subconscious replication of someone’s body language. When you feel connected with someone, you tend to mimic their body posture, positioning, attitude, and maybe even their speech pattern.
The next time you hang out, try to notice how she acts around you.
Does she position her upper body or feet towards you? Does she cross her legs in the same direction? Mirroring is a sign she likes you. Or at the very least, it’s a sign of attraction.
5. She tries to maintain intense eye contact
Does she try to hold your gaze? Do you catch her staring at you when she thinks you’re not looking?
Biologically, using eye contact to establish connection has been a huge part of our mating ritual.
Why? Mutual eye contact steers arousal. But here’s the catch: it only works if someone is actually attracted to you, too.
According to organizational psychologist Ronald Riggio:
“How that arousal is interpreted, however, depends on the parties involved and the circumstances. Being stared at by a stranger who appears large or ominous can be seen as a threat and elicit a fear response.
“However, the gaze of a potential sexual partner causes arousal that can be interpreted positively — as a sexual invitation.”
6. She gives you a “sequence” of seductive actions
Like I mentioned earlier, body language can help you determine if a girl likes you or not.
But the tricky thing is: you can’t tell for sure by just one non-verbal cue.
Mirroring is great and it helps establish a connection. But it can also simply portray friendliness or platonic familiarity.
If a girl really likes you, though, her body language will be more assertive. She’ll give off a sequence of non-verbal cues—not just one.
Neuropsychologist Marsha Lucas gives one particular tip:
“A good one to watch for: After making eye contact, she looks down a bit, gathers or otherwise preens her hair, and then looks up at you while her chin is tipped.”
7. She flirts with you
When a girl flirts with you, it’s definitely a big deal.
A 2015 study conducted by the University of Kansas studied behaviors that reveal romantic attraction. They found that flirting is definitely a big sign that a girl is attracted to you.
According to the study’s lead author, communication studies professor Jeffrey Hall:
“One of the important things to keep in mind is that flirting is an outgrowth of your feeling toward another person — something you can’t easily hinder. When you’re expressing yourself with someone you might like, nonverbal and verbal behaviors begin to reflect attraction, with a coy smile here and a laugh and a tease there, to clarify how you feel about a person.”
“A polite flirt tends to be very hands-off and respectful, but as you can imagine, this type of flirting isn’t obvious to the people they’re attracted toThey lean back, create even more space and are more even in verbal tone. For most people, it signals a lack of closeness, but polite flirts do it more the more attracted they become.”
Culturally, girls tend to be more subtle when they’re flirting. Guys, however, like to flirt more openly because they’ve always been labeled as the “pursuers.” So if a girl flirts with you, it definitely means something.
8. She closes the physical distance between you
There’s this thing called “proxemics.” Proxemics basically tells how comfortable or connected two people are with each other based on the degree of physical distance between them.
When we like someone, we tend to sit or stand closer to them. It communicates familiarity and security. It also a measure of how attracted someone is to you.
According to dating coach Johnny Cassel:
“Think about it: if you’re standing and chatting to two people, one of whom you like more, you’re subconsciously (or perhaps even consciously) going to stand near the one you prefer, or lean in more proactively.”(Video) 10 Signs Your Crush Likes You
He adds another valuable tip, saying:
“Likewise, if a girl doesn’t like you, she will aim to position herself as far away from you as possible. Don’t follow her around. Talk to other girls, and if the sense of competition doesn’t attract her back to you, then it won’t matter anyway.”
9. She’s “available” to you
Does she go out of here way to make herself available to you?
Webster University psychologist Dr. Monica Moore observed the flirting techniques single people use in places where they usually meet potential partners. What she found was interesting. When it came to women, those who were more “successful” at attracting attention weren’t necessarily physically beautiful or even charming.
No. The women who were approached more were the ones who signaled availability.
When a girl likes you, there’s nothing that can stop her from spending time with you. She’ll answer your calls, your texts, and she’ll hang out with you. She’ll willingly invest time, effort, and energy on you because she obviously sees herself with you.
I mentioned earlier what revolutionized my dating game – relationship expert Kate Spring.
She gave me some excellent tips on how to attract the women I want to date, and importantly, how to attract them on a level deeper than most men do.
If you want to do the same, check out her free video here.
You’ll be armed with a few effective tips to start using straight away, perfect if you can’t wait any longer to react when you notice she’s into you.
10. She notices every little thing about you.
Did you suddenly change your hair? Or have you worn a new shirt? Did she notice?
A girl who likes you will take notice of these things. Why? Because she deliberately pays attention to you.
The human brain is great at sorting information. It processes about 4 million bits of information per second, but only consciously retains information that counts. That’s why we don’t remember the faces of strangers we pass by across the street but remember each birthday of a family member.
And that’s why a girl remembers what you said to her that particular day and what kind of shirt you were wearing when you had your first kiss—if she likes you, she’ll notice everything.
11. She’s not afraid to be vulnerable with you
It’s particularly difficult to be vulnerable in this modern age of dating. We’re told that we shouldn’t “catch feelings” too early. Or we should wait a while to call because it makes us look “needy.”
That’s why when a girl is not afraid to be vulnerable with you, it’s more than just “like” or attraction. It means she trusts you. She trusts you enough to let you in her life.
In her book, Daring Greatly, Brené Brown defines vulnerability as, “uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure.” That’s exactly what a person feels like when they allow themselves to be vulnerable to someone.
So if a girl is not afraid to open up to you emotionally, you need to notice and appreciate it. Because it matters. And it probably cost her a lot of courage.
12. She laughs with you
A lot of us have the trait “funny” in our mental list of potential partners.
Humor is particularly important in the early stages of a relationship because it serves as a “social lubricator.” It helps work out the kinks and make two people more at ease with each other.
So if a girl is cracking jokes and laughing at yours, it’s because she wants to create an ideal situation where you can be comfortable and get to know each other without the awkwardness.
13. She’s awkward around you
It’s no breaking news that the first few romantic interactions always go awkwardly.
That’s due to a couple of reasons: you’re both in unchartered territory, trust has yet to be established, and you’re just trying to read each other as subtly as possible.
For girls, the first stage of dating can cause a lot of anxiety and uncertainty. And their brains are literally multitasking between reading you and evaluating what they feel. That’s why they can sometimes be awkward around you. Especially if they like you.
According to relationship therapist Natalie Finegood Goldberg:
“Relationships can be awkward in the beginning because both partners are still feeling things out and trying to read one another. When we are trying to balance the task of reading our partner and being ourselves, our brain is multitasking.
“It’s not combining two tasks we’re familiar with, like eating and walking. The task of reading a new partner is like walking on a new hiking path — a person will pay close attention to their steps, which makes it difficult to relax and be yourself in a way that isn’t awkward.”
So don’t be worried if she seems awkward and uncertain. It’s definitely a good sign.
14. She’s not afraid to touch you.
Touch is the universal language of love. We hug, kiss, and touch the people we feel a strong connection with.
That’s because chemically, our bodies establish emotional bonds using touch.
Here’s the scientific explanation.
Touch, coming from people we like, triggers the part of our brains that produce happy chemicals like dopamine and serotonin—neurotransmitters that regulate mood and relieve stress, and anxiety. On the other hand, we are repulsed, threatened, or disgusted if we’re touched by people we dislike.
If a girl doesn’t recoil at your physical affection, it’s safe to say she likes you.
15. She asks you deep questions
You can tell a lot about the level of interest a girl has by the kind of questions she asks you.
If she’s talking about superficial things, like the way you look, how much money you make, and what kind of parties you go to, chances are, she’s not interested in you for genuine reasons.
But if a girl asks about your dreams, goals, mistakes, and is not afraid to be curious about who you really are—she’s definitely not playing around.
As clinical psychologist Randi Gunther puts it:
“If you both are interested in knowing what you can expect from each other in an intimate, long-term relationship, you should be readily willing to be just as open in return. Being willing to be as honest as you are able will give you the best chance of creating a heads-up as to what your chances of success are down the line.”
You shouldn’t be the only one willing to ask the deep questions. If she likes you, she’ll want to know everything there is to know about you—even the unglamorous parts.
But as hard as it is, I’ve finally cracked the code.
And it’s all thanks to relationship expert Bobby Rio.
He gave me a few simple but highly powerful techniques to make any woman obsessed with me, and boy has it helped my love life.
If you want her to crave you like she’s never craved a man before, check out his excellent free video here.
16. She makes an effort to look beautiful for you
Of course, you know how beautiful she already is. She doesn’t need to change how she looks for you.
But when a girl likes you, she can’t stop herself. She wants to look her best for you.
Biologically, women tend to attract a potential mate when they appear most fertile. As a result, men look for certain characteristics that showcase this the best—youthfulness, for example. Naturally, women are compelled to heighten their chances of conceiving. So they paint their cheeks and lips red and let down their flowing hair.
If she makes a clear effort to look appealing to you, it’s a sign she likes you. Otherwise, she won’t be wasting her time preparing for an hour in her bathroom.
17. Look at her purse
You might be thinking, “what does that have to do with how much she likes me?”
It says a lot, apparently. The way a woman positions her purse around you can say a lot about her feelings for you.
Why? It’s something to do about creating or getting rid of “barriers.”
Ex-FBI behavioral analyst Jack Schafer explains:
“People who like each remove any obstacles between them. People who don’t like the person they are with often place barriers between themselves and the person they don’t like. Barriers include personal items such as purses, newspapers, magazines, cups, cushions, and similar items.”
A girl never goes out without her purse. So the next time you see her, observe. If she puts her purse in front of her, clutches it tightly to herself, or tries to cover her body with it, it’s probably not a good sign. But if she puts it aside and makes sure there’s no “barrier” between you two, it’s a sign she definitely wants to be there.
She likes you, what next?
There are more than a dozen signs that can tell you how a girl feels about you. But again, nothing is as certain as just asking her yourself.
Still, if a couple of the signs above ticked some boxes, it’s a good sign to continue pursuing her until you’re more confident enough to openly talk about your feelings.
But if you want to take things to the next level with this girl, you don’t need to play games or act like someone you aren’t.
In fact, there are a few simple techniques you can use that’ll change the way you approach women for good.You can check them out in this free video by Kate Spring.
I mentioned her earlier – she’s a relationship expert who shares the most basic but effective, biology-driven techniques for getting through to women on a deep level.
Since learning about her, my dating game is stronger than ever. And the best part?
I actually understand how women work in love and relationships now. No more second-guessing, no more ending up in the friend zone.
There are no strings attached, just pure, valuable advice on upping your game around women.
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- She exposes her neck (to release pheromones).
- She tilts her chin down and looks up through her eyelashes (called the “coquette look”).
- She touches her hair (to release pheromones and call attention to her health).
- She touches her lips (to call attention to their shape).
- She Prioritizes You.
- She Gets Jealous.
- She Always Tries to Be around You.
- She Listens to You.
- She Legitimately Cares about You.
- She Tries to Impress You.
- She's Always Flirting with You.
- She Cares about Your Future Plans.
Key Pointers. Smiling at you, touching you, or wanting to be around you are some signs showing her interest in you. Her open body language, nervous actions, and personal questions will help you know her feelings. She finds all possibilities to complement you.How do you know if someone likes you science? ›
Mimicking behaviours (copying someone's movements), initiating conversation and close physical proximity are the top signs someone likes you, according to the research, followed by making eye contact, nodding, smiling and laughing.How do you know if a girl has chemistry? ›
- It is sizzling from the start. ...
- Your eyes can't seem to disconnect. ...
- The sexual tension is palpable. ...
- Their body language tells you so. ...
- You don't hold back. ...
- You cherish every moment you spend together. ...
- Sex with them is divine. ...
- Self-consciousness becomes the new thing for you.
If she makes plans with you, knows everything about you, and feels shy around you, she may be trying to hide her feelings for you. If her friends know about you, it is a clear indication that the relationship with you means a lot to her.What are the first signs of true love? ›
- You feel safe with them. ...
- They listen. ...
- They acknowledge your differences instead of trying to change you. ...
- You can communicate easily. ...
- They encourage you to do your own thing. ...
- You trust each other. ...
- They make an effort. ...
- You know you can collaborate or compromise.
If a woman shares everything with you, she loves you truly and is comfortable opening up about her life to you. You will be her confidant, someone with whom she can share her deepest desires, dreams, and fears. If she considers you her best friend, she trusts you, and you are an important part of her life.How do I get her to confess her feelings? ›
Treating a girl well, flirting with her, and being honest about your feelings are all great ways to give her the confidence to tell you that she likes you. Once you are able to make a girl feel comfortable, she'll be more likely to be honest about her feelings for you.What makes a girl develop feelings for a guy? ›
They desire a sincere, family-oriented, honest, trustworthy, and respectful man. A woman often looks for a man who will treat her with love, care, and respect without drama. Hence, if you want your crush to fall in love, show your best personality to her.
Key Takeaways. The instant attraction and that ”spark” you feel with someone is a tell-tale sign of chemistry between you two. If you find yourself making intense eye contact, flirting, and always smiling at someone, you probably have good chemistry with them.What makes you attracted to someone scientifically? ›
They include physical attractiveness, proximity, similarity, and reciprocity: Physical attractiveness: Research shows that romantic attraction is primarily determined by physical attractiveness. In the early stages of dating, people are more attracted to partners whom they consider to be physically attractive.What causes intense chemistry with someone? ›
Romantic chemistry focuses on characteristics present between two people, including mutual interests, similarity, and intimacy. According to Kelly Campbell, P.h.D., the more present these characteristics are, the more likely two individuals will perceive chemistry between each other. According to Kelly Campbell, Ph.How can you tell if two people have chemistry? ›
There are lots of ways to tell if the chemistry is right between two people. For one thing, they tend to be drawn to each other physically. They might find themselves gravitating towards each other in a crowded room, or they might notice that they're always standing next to each other when they talk.How do you know if your attraction is mutual? ›
- They tease you about things. ...
- They make excuses to touch you. ...
- You care what the other person thinks. ...
- You miss them when you aren't together. ...
- You can't stop smiling. ...
- You don't notice others around you. ...
- They pay attention to you. ...
- You laugh when you're with them.
- Observe their body language.
- They pay attention to you.
- Eye contact.
- They make time for you.
- They quickly apologize when they offend you.
- They don't say much.
- They are afraid.
- She's nervous around you. ...
- She engages you in conversation. ...
- She maintains longer eye contact. ...
- She's first to text. ...
- She 'likes' you on social media. ...
- She has open body language. ...
- She smiles at your silly jokes. ...
- She mirrors your body language.
- Being with them feels like home. ...
- You balance each other out. ...
- You respect each other's differences, but agree about the important things. ...
- You challenge each other. ...
- You can totally be yourself. ...
- You fight for the relationship.
He Always Tries to Impress You
One of the signs he secretly loves you, is he often tries to impress you. He might try hard not to make his feelings obvious, he might not want to say he actually loves you — but then he'll never miss out on an opportunity to impress you. Advit would always do it.
The closest to the pre-love stage is that of infatuation, which is marked by feelings, "high in passion but low in commitment and intimacy, which will come later," Whitbourne told Mic.
- I love you. In this generation, hearing those words is everything. ...
- You're the one. This one is a no-brainer right here. ...
- Just kiss me! ...
- Unlimited hot pizza... ...
- You're the G.O.A.T. ...
- I miss you. ...
- Pack your bags! ...
- Good morning, beautiful.
- Work on yourself & have your own life. ...
- Be optimistic. ...
- Keep the conversation going. ...
- Respect her as an equal. ...
- Be her friend and make it fun. ...
- Be anything but clingy. ...
- Take it slow – things will fall in place. ...
- Don't make yourself too available.
You can always be direct and just ask him about his feelings for you. Be straightforward and come to the point and make him realise that he can be honest with you and express his feelings for you without being judged or critiqued.How will a girl react if she knows you like her? ›
Stay attentive of her actions.
If she knows and does like you back she will talk to you more, walk near you, sit next to you, make eye contact, twirl her hair, or give you compliments. She may also be secretive about who she likes.
- Go on at least five dates.
- Say it only after two months.
- Don't wait too long.
- Wait until you're absolutely bursting.
- Do not do it before, after, or during sex.
- Don't say it when you're very emotional and cannot think rationally.
- Don't say it when you want to reward your partner for something.
Women desire a man who is honorable, fair, and ethical. In terms of relationships, having integrity can help strengthen the bond a man has with a woman, as his moral principles will guide his behavior and help him to be the best partner that he can be.How does a girl show interest in a guy? ›
Among the dozen above, the most common signals of female interest are smiles, direct eye contact, and/or repeated glances towards and away from you.How to trap a girl in love? ›
- Make eye contact with her and smile.
- Get a little closer to her. Maybe move to a closer table in the coffee shop, or go grab a napkin while she is at the condiment station. ...
- Tilt your head if you are talking to her or looking at her. Head-tilting is a sign of interest.
- Drop some hints.
- Set a deadline for yourself.
- Pump yourself up first.
- Tell her in person, if possible.
- Text her if you can't meet up in person.
- Write her a note to be romantic.
- Simply say, “I like you.”
- Ask her if she likes you.
- Indulge in a little “courtship feeding.” ...
- Skip the razor for a while (but not for too long). ...
- Ditch the pickup lines. ...
- Dress in red. ...
- Crack a lot of jokes (but only the good ones). ...
- Smell like gasoline, printer ink, or leather…or, just smell. ...
- Get older.
Treating a girl well, flirting with her, and being honest about your feelings are all great ways to give her the confidence to tell you that she likes you. Once you are able to make a girl feel comfortable, she'll be more likely to be honest about her feelings for you.What to say to a girl to make her like you? ›
- I can't stop thinking about you.
- How are you today?
- Your smile is on my mind.
- I really enjoyed the time we spent together today.
- Being with you makes me incredibly happy.
- You make me feel like a million bucks.
- I have been so much happier since we started spending time together.
One of the most important characteristics that most women seek is modesty. Outspokenness, charity, and honesty are further feminine appeal traits that are always observed, along with humility. Nothing appeals to a woman more than a man with a great sense of self.What triggers female attraction? ›
Emotional attraction is all about how you make another person FEEL. It can be triggered in a variety of ways: through touch, pheromones, body language, behavior, the tone of your voice, humor, confidence, and vulnerability. (Vulnerability is a really big one.)How do you tell if she wants you to make a move? ›
- She makes consistent eye contact with you. ...
- She flirts with you. ...
- She texts you first. ...
- She “likes” or engages with your social media posts. ...
- She wants to be near you. ...
- She initiates contact. ...
- She smiles at you — a lot. ...
- In group settings, she pulls you aside for alone time.
Asking to spend time with you could mean she's into you.
She might not ask you out directly, but even just a “Let's hang out!” on a regular basis is a potential indicator that she wants to be more than friends. Making plans is also a good way to test out what a long-term relationship with someone might be like.